What’s wrong?

26 Dec

I can never be like, the best at anything or the best person for anyone. There’s always this nagging feeling that tells me I’m the unwanted. I am really not sure though, but it felt like I am always the second option.

Not in that kind of thing you’re thinking about. But maybe I can say in some situation, it’s applicable too.

Well, for some reason, I had the feeling that some of my friends don’t really like me. Seriously, I can’t even keep my friends. For example, my high school friends, I seldom keep in touch with them. And it feels like we’re not really close anymore. Like I am not thrilled with their stories and I don’t get what they’re trying to say like I used to before (well, that’s how I remembered it, sorry guys).

It’s sad you know. When they don’t even do things to keep in touch with you.  When all you had was your busy sched that you forgot about them. But maybe, the problem is in me.

The problem of not reaching out to them, the problem of always waiting and expecting that they’d be first.

I always had this kind of ego – I don’t do the first move, let them do it.

Which is why some people neglect me. And that scares me – when they left me alone.

Oh, how emotional.

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Posted by on December 26, 2010 in Doomsday


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