Here we go again…
Yea yea I feel like I am such a douche-bag. Like I punched someone in the face virtually. Why? Why is it things always ended up like that? Why can’t I be, for once, nice when it came to such things I am talking about?
I mean, it’s my defense mechanism and all. Staying away and shunning people out of my life. Or, staying away from boys and shunning them out of my life once I discovered they had a thing for me. I swear that wasn’t nice. It was rude actually.
But, can I help it?
I can’t. I don’t know how. I am confused. Part of me wants to say, “Sorry!” and part of me wants to stay silent and let it grow out. Let it all disappear. Why can’t this floor I am currently standing now swallow me?
I am so shallow and selfish and yea, a douchebag. I just didn’t realize it sooner. I’m a brat…or a bitch. Or yea, anything you can say on my face because that’s me.
Harsh when it came to serious things like this.
I just didn’t realize how I miss things the way it was before. Crazy me and crazier you. We’re best of friends yet why did it happened?
My head says, “Who cares?” But then my heart says, “You do, stupid…”
I care about the friendship. Oh gosh, I never thought love could ruin friendship…
I never want to fall. YEABOI